This past morning the people in radio-land were talking about stupid things people buy after a breakup. Apparently people are actually more likely to make unwise spending decisions following a relationships demise. Rather than sulking into a state of utter turmoil and crying about how “my life is over! I cannot go on!” we find things to waste money on. I was particularly amazed by some of the financial decisions people made afterwards. Multiple stories were told of those who took vacations with a new ‘friend’, bought cars, whole new wardrobes, and someone even allegedly went to viva Las Vegas and viva la maxed out his credit cards (idiot). The list of emotional band-aids was so vast! To be fair, they were giving out a mug or something for the worst spending mistake, so who knows how valid some of these stories were. Intriguing topic nonetheless, and it inspired me to discuss it.

Breakups are tough!

I get it. Breakups are tough. You shared something special with someone who was once your other half. There’s no way around the grieving process, it’s something that your going to have to endure. But spending some serious cash on shit that’s not going to heal the emotional wound should be avoided. That being said, maybe there are some beneficial goods you can spend your money on to help overcome. A BMW would likely be one of those things you shouldn’t run out and buy in your state of emotional turmoil. It’d be pretty freaking sweet for a little while I imagine, until the euphoria settles and your stuck crying over your lost love on top of your new vehicle payments. Sound decisions are key. Think of current interests and how you can focus on those without throwing your money around.

What post-breakup expenditures can help? A personal story…

I’ll be talking from experience here. I actually went through a breakup fairly recently. So I really do understand. What you endure afterwords is pretty damn rough. But I also understand at some point you have to power through and move on! You can’t grieve over it for ever. Life goes on, so shake it off! But use caution here. It’s important to really think about your next moves before you take them. When I went through my most recent I thought about what I could do to get my mind off of it. What I learned is that it’s best to occupy your mind elsewhere. I had already been reading a lot of books with interest into Personal Finance and Business. So I went to the book store and loaded up on some books I had yet to dip into that were on my reading list. I spent money on something I had already invested a lot of interest in before the breakup. I wasn’t changing who I am, running away to another country, or going on any expensive binges. Books are on my list of ‘appreciating assets’. Being fully engaged in them helped keep my mind thriving on positive thoughts.

Oh and if your reading this, your actually looking at part of another remedy I used to get over it. My next post-breakup purchase was the domain as well as the hosting package for this very website. STOP right there if your reading this and thinking of doing the same! I really put some thought into it before I pulled the trigger. Remember what I said about buying based on emotion. I was upset and looking for something to help. Purchasing domains and hosting when I hadn’t planned it out would have been rather unwise. Taking a lot into consideration, I felt I needed to start a project. I’ve always been interested in starting a blog. I wasn’t ever really sure what about. I love fitness, but I don’t think I could really get into writing about it. Plus Steve Kamb over at Nerd Fitness already writes with an approach I would have, and even better than I could have! (You win Steve, your good!) Personal Finance was a topic I really felt like I could write a lot about. When I talk with friends about money, I usually offer some tips and I enjoy when they’re appreciated. I love helping people out, so why not!? Give it a shot! Taking quite some time planning, designing the logo, and then planning some more, I finally pulled out my credit card and made the purchases. By taking the time to plan I realized I was spending less time thinking about the end of my relationship. I felt I was doing something beneficial for myself and it has helped tremendously. The fact that I was moving away from upset and feeling good about something was clutch. That’s why I put money towards this project. I think the cost of starting something new and being able to watch it grow earns me a solid fist pump after hearing what others were spending following a breakup on the radio.

dwight-schrute-celebration-jump

YES DWIGHT! WE DID THIS!

This time around it went well. But…

This time around I came out on top. But I should also mention a previous time when I went through a relationships end. I carelessly invested in some seriously expensive urea production, and beating the shit out of my liver. It’s hard to save when you frequently go out on the town trying to get over someone. Following that instance I did not make very wise financial decisions at all. It’s important to factor in that I’ve come a long way since then, with regards to my financial consciousness and knowledge. Still, I don’t think it would have mattered. I was saving quite well before that breakup. Then I had that ‘I don’t care, I need to get my mind off of it’ attitude. Either way I spent a lot of money instead of saving it. But I learned from that and how I could avoid it. Live and learn! Live. And. Learn..

So the moral of this article?

Don’t do anything after a breakup you’ll likely be shaking your head at later on in life. It’s tough, your definitely going through a lot that’ll fog your better judgement. Take a period to just do nothing. Let it sink in, then really think about who you are and what you can do to benefit yourself. Now I am probably going to sound all preachy here but just focus on benefiting yourself. From my experience spending a lot of money to not help the situation vs. spending less money to better myself had a dramatic difference in results. The cycle of bad spending after a relationship can become create some baaad habits, especially when your holding onto a sad “I don’t care anymore” attitude. Hopefully going into it you are, or at least becoming, a more financially conscious person. Remember who you are and where your interests lie. And if you decide to take up something new that will benefit you, don’t let that translate into the need to spend a lot on it. Remember to be careful when emotions involved. Don’t buy a BMW thinking it’ll make you feel better. You’ll be alright, I promise.

WHAT ARE SOME THINGS YOU SPENT MONEY ON AFTER A BREAKUP? DID YOU MAKE ANY POOR SPENDING DECISIONS BASED ON EMOTION? DID YOU MAKE ANY WISE ONES AND FEEL BETTER FOR IT? SHARE YOUR STORIES BELOW!

FF$!

-Jason

 

One Response to How Breakups Can Affect Your Spending, and How You Can Avoid Making Financial Mistakes Because of Them

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